Reality Check

Let’s face it. Most of us, well, all of us are subjective when it comes to evaluating ourselves. We can easily see and criticize the weaknesses in others, but not ourselves. We don’t usually say, “I need to change to make my marriage better.” It’s more like, “if my spouse would change our marriage would be better.” We don’t usually say “If I would manage my money better I wouldn’t have so much financial stress.” It’s more like, “if my boss would pay me more, I wouldn’t have the financial troubles I have.” A reality check is realizing that we need to take personal responsibility for our lives.

I think of King David, after he committed adultery and conspired to commit murder. He seared his conscience by doing what he wanted, not what God expected. He didn’t change until the prophet Nathan looked him in the eye and said, “You’re the man.” That is what you call a “reality check.” A truth that broadsides us back into reality.

A few years ago Pastor Kirk (my friend and mentor) did that for me. I had planted a church, with a group of friends whom I loved and still love very much, each of them are now doing some kind of ministry in church and several of them in full time ministry. No doubt, it was a great experience, but it just wasn’t working. In hind sight I can see I chose to plant a church for convenience, not that there’s anything convenient about it except, it was the only available opportunity that fit with what I thought I should do. Needless to say, and I won’t go into the whole story, we weren’t doing well.

When I was in the middle of this project, my wife, Janae kept saying to me, “you need to call Pastor Kirk.” To be honest the last person I wanted to speak with was Kirk Pankratz. I was embarrassed and felt like a failure. I didn’t want to tell Pastor Kirk, “my church is not growing, I’m depressed, we’re broke, my wife is mad at me. So I just wouldn’t call him.

Out of the blue, Pastor Kirk calls me. He invites us to come up and hang out with his family. Hesitantly, (meaning I couldn’t think of an excuse fast enough) I said yes. Now, the rest of this story is a divine reality check.

Kirk, asked me, “So, how’s it going?” I, the paragon of virtue that I am, begin to spill the truth. “Everything is great!” I said. I don’t even remember what else I said, but it was just more nonsense. Then, Pastor Kirk turned to Janae, as if I hadn’t said a word, he asked Janae, “how’s it really going?” She blurts out with no hesitation at all, “It’s horrible, and he is working himself to death. We are not growing, we are struggling financially, (code for Broke!) and he won’t stop!” all the while I am kicking her under the table.

There I am, in a heap, officially “reality checked.” I knew it was all true, and that my stubborn pride was hurting my destiny, my family, my team, and myself. Kirk and Nancy said something to me that was life changing. “…as long as you don’t give up on Gods plan for your life you’re not a failure.”

So here is a reality check for you. To change is not to admit you’re a failure but it is the true path to success. Don’t let pride and arrogance hold you back from your purpose in God. What ever needs to change, just admit your wrong, and change, and God will move quickly on your behalf. Consider yourself “Reality Checked.”

-David Gadberry

Wide Awake…and back on this side of the world

Well its 3:30 a.m. here in Oklahoma, and i’m wide awake.  I guess my clock is still on Africa time, the places i was it would be 11:30 a.m. almost lunch time, I hope I don’t get hungry too.  Thats all I need to start eating at 3 in the morning.

So, while I’m up anyway I thought I would share with you a lesson I learned in Rwanda.  After a great Pastors and believers conference, we were milling around and a lot of different people wanted to talk, you know, tell me what they had learned or received from the conference, thanking us for coming, etc.  One of my interpreters came to me and said there is a little mother who would like to speak with you before you leave.  I said ok, she waited for a long time, and finally we walked over to her, and I hugged her and said hello.  She begin to tell us that she had heard me talk about what we were doing for orphans, and she would like to tell me her story and see if I could help her.  She told me that her husband had died two months previous, and he didn’t leave the family prepared.  She has eight children, not uncommon for this culture and they were making it fine when dad was alive but now he was dead, and she had recently lost her job.  She told me that if something didn’t happen, she would not be able to feed her family or pay their rent.  She asked if I would help.  I wave of irritation came over me, because there was really nothing I could do, I thought.

I had the interpreter tell her that I wish i could do something, but the budget we have is very specific and I can’t take monies that are already committed and give to her, because they would be breaking my word to people I promised I would help.  I said, but i will do the most powerful thing I can do, I will pray with you.  by the way I do believe that is the most powerful thing I can do, however sometimes in a moment like this it makes you feel completely impotent, thinking of a need that is so immediate.  So I prayed with her, She cried, and I cried, I hugged her, told her I loved her, and walked away feeling like a hypacrite.  I was thinking, you love her?  then why didn’t you help her, I said to God, this is not right,  i know that my prayer avails much, but please don’t ask me to come to a place that has such need without enough resource to meet the needs I can, I broke my heart, I have to say it made me mad.  I walked back to my room, very frustrated, very angry, this little mother, has not options.

I asked her during the process can you go to your pastor and can help you?  She told me a story that is indicitive of Rwanda right now.  They do not want churches putting up temporary facilities because they are trying to set building standards.  If you don’t have the money to build a permanent facility and you don’t have the money to rent a hall you literally have to disband your church and meet in homes, so many of them are doing cells in homes, but many of them see this as to difficult and are disbanding.  Her pastor disband his church so right now she is without a church home.  So i recommended a church she should try, and then prayed and walked off.

As I was changing clothes, and getting ready to go eat, which felt like an indictment in itself.  I just failed to help a lady who was about to go in to a very difficult time and not be able to feed her family and here I am about to take my team to a restaurant and Eat together, and the cost of it would sustain this lady for a month or more.

As i’m changing, I’m asking, “why couldn’t I help this lady,”  and I believe God impressed on my heart, “why couldn’t you?”  My answer was the same I gave her.  “I don’t have it in the budget,”  The impression grew stronger, “who cares about the budget what do you have in your pocket?”  It dawned on me, the money I had in my pocket would go along way to helping her.  I only had what would equal about 20 or 30 american dollars, but I got inspired.

I finished changing, got my bag, and headed to the bus.  When I got on, I told the bus driver “find that lady, she is walking home, find her.”  No one accept my interpreter and the bus driver new what was going on, and I didn’t have time to explain, but I asked, who will give me, I cant remember what their money is called, but it was the equivalent of 9 or 10 dollars.  I said who will give 10 dollars, I didn’t say why, I didn’t say what it was for, No one cared.  I heard I give it, another Ill give it, and from the back of the bust to the front, people started handing me money.  American’s rwandans everyone.  Finally we rolled up on this woman, I said let me off this bus, and I ran out and met with her, and I apalogized and said there is something I can do, I can give you this.  I handed her this roll of money, I don’t know how much it was, but in her life it was a lot.  She cried and was so thankful, I couldn’t understand what she was saying, but I could sense her gratitude and her love.

This story made me realize that we as americans, we do care, we do want to help, but many times we think if we can’t solve the whole problem then there is nothing we can do.  I don’t know why I thought like that, I don’t know why I thought I have nothing to give, when I clearly did.  We must make it personal, we must realize, no we may not be able to fix it all but there is something we can do.  I am reminded of Moses, God said, “use what you have in your hand.”  I’m reminded of Gideon, “use your pitchers and trumpets, ‘what you have.’”  I’m reminded of Joseph, he used his gift of administration.”  I’m reminded of the new testament church, they used what they had.  Their homes, their love, their friendship, their money, just what they had.  Its amazing what God can do, and what He will make up for if we will just use what we have, and do something.

I really learned something that day, and I will carry it into my day to day activities in my world, because this means everyday, i can do something significant to help someone who needs my help.  Everyday, think about it……Every Day!

I love Jesus

David

Clear the Clutter…

 

Have you ever moved?  If you’re like me you would rather get poked in the eye with a tire iron, than to pack everything up and move it.  The one thing I’ve noticed about moving is, each time we’ve done it we have more stuff than the last time. 

       Some of this “stuff” is no doubt excellent and has great purpose, but when you look around, you realize, a lot of it is useless junk.  Toys your kids haven’t played with in years.  Things that you bought, and said, “I have to have this!” then hardly used it. 

The question is how does all this accumulation affect us?  One effect is, it clutters our homes.  Have you ever felt like you’re cleaning and picking up constantly?  It feels like the job’s never done. 

Another effect is a lack of space.  Have you ever wanted to put your car in the garage, but there was no room?  The garage is made to keep your car out of the weather, and give you easy access to your home, but if you have needless accumulation the car stays outside and you walk in the winter weather to get to the front door and your stuff is packed neatly and “warmly” I might add, in the garage.

Our lives at times look like this type of house.  They are filled will accumulated trinkets of one kind or another. The thing about clutter is, it doesn’t matter if it’s negative or positive, if there’s not room for it in the house it throws everything out of order.  Hebrews 12:1 says “therefore we also, since we are surrounded with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and sin….”  You know, it’s not always sinful and bad things that complicate our lives, sometimes it can be things that are moral and positive but because there is no room for them in our lives they become a weight.  

       Life’s accumulations are just like the clutter in our house, they create an environment where we are constantly picking up after ourselves but don’t seem to be making any progress.  Just like the garage not being used appropriately, our lives many times get out of order because of all the extra accumulation.  When we should be spending time in prayer, or with our families, or working on our marriage, those things which are true priority, we are running around, trying to be seen with the right people, to have the right stuff, and be involved in the right extra curricula’s, yeah, “walking in the cold to the front door, instead of parking in the safety of the garage with easy access to the house.” 

        Another thing accumulation causes is indecisiveness.  We are worried about finances, and relationships, about acceptance and lack of time.  Our mind is so full, going in so many directions that we can’t decide what needs to be done.  We become double minded. 

I know its winter, but it’s time for a good spring cleaning.  Sweep out the clutter; get rid of things that are not truly priority.  Matthew 6:31 (msg) says ^“What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. ³²People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works.”

How do we de-clutter our lives? How do we measure what’s necessary and what’s not?  How do we know when something that is not wrong has become unnecessary accumulation?

       What do we do when our house gets cluttered?  We clean house.  We put things in order. 

Cleaning house takes the renewal of some things and the removal of others.  We have to renew our priorities.  Those things that God says are most important, and then remove the things that steal time and devotion from them.    

       Sometimes we create worry and anxiety in our lives, being frustrated over all the clutter.  We say, “I am so tired of this clutter.” “I am so busy; I don’t have time to clean up.”  The problem with this mind set is nothing changes, as a matter of fact it gets worse and we become more anxious.  Let’s just do what Jesus said, and relax.  Quit fretting and worrying, and clean up.  Matthew 6:33(NKJ) says “seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness and all these things will be added unto you.”

       By doing this we are renewing our focus, we are removing distractions.  We are setting our lives in order to fulfill their true purpose, and to achieve true happiness and fulfillment.

       So, gather your family around, get your broom, and start sweeping.  And before you know it, you’ll be parking in the garage again.  Have a great Christ Centered day.

      

 

-David Gadberry