Something to Say About Leadership…It’s all about perspective

A great lesson I’ve learned over the years is all people see life through certain filters, or lenses. Our lives are truly a vision of the perspectives we have. Many people can’t seem to get ahead in life, because they see themselves as a victim, so they view life from that perspective. Everything that happens, every relationship, every opportunity, every rejection to them is about the fact that everyone is against them, they are doing their best and people are just keeping them down. It’s amazing what a little perspective change can do. Simply shifting the “way” we see things, can have a profound effect on our lives.

I believe there’s a cycle here. The cycle works this way. We have certain perspectives, view points (the point from which we see things). Our perspectives effect our view, which effects our thoughts. Our thoughts effect our actions. Our actions solicit responses, and those responses bring reinforcement to our perspectives.

Let me give you an example. If a person thinks that others don’t like them, then when they go to pubic gatherings, they are usually reserved, shy, disconnected. This action sends out a vibe that says don’t approach me, so people in response stay back, and this reinforces in that persons mind, “see, I knew people didn’t like me, I should have just stayed home.” Is there truth to this, no. There is no evidence that people don’t like them. They are just stuck in the cycle of fear of rejection, because they have a perspective, for whatever reason that they are not liked. Maybe it was a rejection by a parent, maybe it was betrayal by a friend in their youth. Who knows, but their perspective has them trapped.

On the other hand if you have a person who thinks everyone likes them, their actions speak of confidence and openness, the response is people are drawn to them, and it reinforces their thought, “see, I knew it, every one likes me.”

In either of these situations the fact that people do or don’t like them, doesn’t matter, what matters is their perspective. Because they will behave in ways directed by the way they see things, and their behavior will evoke a response, and the response will reinforce their perspective.

You can see how important perspective is. How do you see your life? What are the filters you see through? What perspectives need to change or even be done away with? If we’re going to lead, then we need to make sure our perspectives are not driven by insecurity. We can’t see the world through fear, and expect to be successful leaders.

There are two places this cycle can be broken. One is in a person changing their perspective, another is in people responding in love to a person regardless of their actions, which can break the cycle and give them a new perspective. Both of these are acts of leadership, and both of these take massive amounts of courage and security. We can do it!

What are perspective shifts you’ve had? How did they effect your life?

Next blog, we will talk about the next step towards security.

thanks
David

Something to Say About Leadership…What is Insecurity?

In life we hear the word insecurity often. We use this word to describe people who lack confidence, people who wear their emotions on their sleeves, and people who are enamored with the idea of pleasing other people.

What is insecurity really? The dictionary defines it as an unsafe feeling. A state of mind characterized by self-doubt and vulnerability. So insecurity is a feeling of not being secure. It is a feeling of being a target for hurt or harm, when you get right down to it insecurity in its true meaning is just plane fear, the fear that we are not safe.

We’ve thought of insecurity as an overly emotional state, immaturity, and a lack of confidence. All these things characterize insecurity. They also Characterize fear. Insecurity simply means I’m afraid I’m going to be rejected. It means I’m afraid I’m going to fail. It means I’m afraid I’m going to hurt. It means I’m afraid to risk. It means I just don’t feel safe.

We can all see how this can sabotage a leader. This type of thinking paralyzes a leader. Keeps them from moving forward. Keeps their focus on their performance not the vision. What we need to do however is remove the mystery from the word insecurity and just call it what it is, Fear. Say it after me. “I am afraid.” We all go through this at different times. It’s what we do in those times that matters. Will we see insecurity for what it is and eliminate it, or will we see it as a small weakness and let it stay. It’s fear, and if you are a leader fear is your mortal enemy!

Fear is the enemy of the leader. That’s the way we should look at it. We need to listen and believe the bible. Romans 8:15 says, “we have not been given the spirit of bondage again to fear, but the spirit of adoption whereby we cry abba father. It says in Timothy, “God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of love, of power, and of a sound mind. So Fear does the transverse of this passage. It eliminates love, makes us feel weak, and paints us into a corner of confusion. Fear is an enemy to the leader.

We need to understand the power Insecurity and fear can have if we allow it in our lives. What does it cause? If I fear people’s opinions than I can’t lead with a clear vision, If I fear taking a risk, or failing, then I will stick with the status quo. If I fear rejection from people I will be obsessed with my performance and never feel like I’m good enough. It really is a killer of leadership. We must force it out of our lives.

I taught our staff today, on the idea that leading progress requires courage. Its possible to lead and not be moving forward, Moses did it for 40 years in the wilderness. It took courage for Joshua to get it moving forward. God told Joshua in the book of Joshua chapter one, to “be strong and of good courage and not to be afraid” four times. He was getting the point across to Joshua that it was going to take courage to lead to the fulfillment of the dream, to do the right things, to stand against fear itself, and bottom line it takes courage to lead people. It requires us to do the uncomfortable, to confront, and to influence others.

When I was starting out, I wanted everyone to like me. I thought that was leadership. It made me second-guess my communication. I wondered constantly if I was measuring up. It caused me to compete with others in my own mind, and to compare myself with others. I was afraid I would be rejected or I wouldn’t succeed. It wasn’t until I realized leadership is a “stand alone” place much of the time and It takes courage to help people. You can’t help people if you are constantly seeking their approval, because then it’s all about you and not them.

There are ways to defeat this fear. There are perspectives we must have, and perspectives we must change to defeat this enemy. It can be done.

Next blog I will talk about the first way to overcome insecurity, and how our perspectives can create either a vicious cycle of fear, or a victories cycle of confidence.

Hope this is helping you. Please comment on fears you have faced in leadership and how you have overcome them.

-David

Something to say about Leadership

Over 20 years ago I began my journey as a leader. My Journey if far from over. I still have much to learn, and haven’t begin to tap into the true potential that could be realized in my life. I wish I could say that I have reached some sort of pinnacle, but what I have found to be true at the age of forty, is that those who think they have reached the top, really haven’t, but have left themselves no where to go but down.

True, effective leaders are always growing, and developing themselves, and everyone around them. A true leader gives the benefit of their growth to those following them.

I am going to attempt over the next few weeks to blog each day on an issue of leadership. Over the last two decades I’ve read many books, I’ve attended many conferences. I have had the privilege of setting under the ministry of some of the greatest leaders out there and had the opportunity to meet them and set and listen to them.

Over this time I have gleaned enormous amounts of resource, but to be honest this is not where I’ve received most of my leadership “education.” In those settings I learned principles, and leadership thoughts, but it has been in the everyday activities of leading alongside the leaders over me, beside me, and those following me, where I have learned the most. Not because they knew more than the experts, but because we were putting into practice those things we learned.

In this series of blogs I am not going to try to tell you all the principles of leadership that will work for you. I am going share with you experiences in my own life, and in the lives of leaders I’ve watched rise, and fall.

There are things that kill Leadership. Enemies of leadership. Most of them are not external. They are not an enemy from without, but an enemy from within. Pretense, Fear, Jealousy, competition, envy, pride and Greed. All of these, everyone of them, can be summed up in one word, “INSECURITY.” In my mind the greatest Killer of leaders and our influence. Insecurity is sneaky, its often hidden, its always revealed under pressure, and ultimately it will choke the life of leadership out of any leader who doesn’t remove it.

As I write these next few blogs, I hope it will reveal places of insecurity in us and help us to understand there is a way to overcome it. Our leadership can thrive! Our Potential can be realized! We can be Secure, confident, happy, and content, and at the same time very influential.

stay tuned….

Does anybody Care?

I have a great life! I get to meet a lot of people, from different backgrounds, in diverse settings, and issues on different levels. Just for the record, everyone deals with “stuff.” Everyone. Everyone in this life has ups and downs. Many victories and many travesties, and sometimes they come right on the heals of each other.

The one thing I know that “life” is not prejudice. It does not prejudge in any way. Everyone goes through it. By the way there is only one option if you don’t want to go through it. I think that life is what you make it, our perspective has a lot to do with our survival. Whether dealing with good or bad times, we can choose to be positive.

I think one problem we have, is when we get down, we can’t see anyone else. Its like, all of a sudden our life is locked in to a long stare in the mirror, and we don’t like what we see. I was watching “extreme home makeover” the other day, I love it. I love seeing people do good things for other people. There was a young man on it named Patrick Henry Hughes. He was born without eyes, and without the ability to straighten his limbs. He is now nineteen and quite an inspiration. He is a great musician! I can’t do his story justice by any mean, he is so inspirational! He has a book out, I’m going to get it. I can’t Imagine how so many of us have such minor issues compared to him, and yet he and his dad worked together to keep him moving forward, and we can find every excuse to slow to almost a stop.

When we are down and in that stare down with ourselves we can’t see anyone else, so the question arises, does anyone care? The answer of course, is yes! Absolutely yes! Someone does care. First and foremost God cares. The bible says in 2 Peter, that we should cast our care on Him because He cares for us. Others care. I bet we would be surprised how many other people care, if we would just let them in, if we, when we’re hurt would let down our guard and quit sending the message that we don’t want to be bothered.

I’ve had several wake up calls in my life. I call them that, because they are I was asleep to, until someone woke me up. Issues like human trafficking, foster kids, HIV/aides, orphans, starving people around the globe. When I first wake up to an issue, i always get zealous, then I see the need, it seems overwhelming, then I decide what i can do to help, then I go about doing it. In this process there is always a temptation to say, why doesn’t anyone care? Where are all the people that should be doing something about this? However, invariably I find out as i continue my quest to help, there are a lot of people out there caring. Some of them have different motives than others, but what I can say is Somebody does care.

Yes, more should care, and its up to us to get more people informed and involved, but lets not curse the baby as we are throwing the bath water out. I encourage you if your down, realize no one can read your mind. Ask yourself, “is my attitude a sign on my forehead that says, stay away from me?”

Ask for help. Ask someone to get involved. Tell someone close to you, that you need them, because I tell you with certainty, someone does care. Don’t give up, don’t quit, someone does care. If you can’t do anything but cry out to God and ask him to send someone to you, He will. He cares.

Someone Who Cares
David

“I Love the Lord”…..Whitney Houston

I watched the rerun of the Oprah show late tonight and saw the second interview with Whitney Houston. I really didn’t know what to expect, but I was so impressed with her. She was very honest without being disrespectful, which i would imagine would have been very difficult given what she has experienced. It seems her life, had become very much like so many lives today. Simply out of control. Her marriage, her emotions, her physical life, and her career. Everything was out of control.

She obviously made some bad choices, and got herself in a mess. Addicted to drugs, estranged from her husband, and just trying to pull it together. My favorite part of the interview was when Oprah said, “who do you love?” Whitney replied, “I love the Lord” Oprah asked her so how did you make it? She said I know where my strength comes from, I would never have made it if it wasn’t for God.

Our lives may or may not be out of control today, but it wouldn’t hurt for us to remember we can not make it without Jesus. He has done so much for us, and his grace is so good, and has empowered us to overcome all the negatives in life. So tonight I say like whitney, I love the Lord, and I would never have made it, outside of his goodness and Grace. I know where my strength comes from. Not me, but the Holy Spirit. Thanks Jesus for living in Me, guiding me, encouraging me, and inspiring me, and loving me.

Thanks
David

Marriage, how to do 21 years Effectively

Last Night…

Well the trip has come to a close. I can honestly say we have done all that we could to help the people of Cambodia on this short trip. We have laid a good foundation for future work and have further developed relationships with teams. I love my life, getting to share Jesus with people who so desperately need Him, and get to help people who have need.

Ended the night tonight with a debrief meeting with the team. We do this because I want to talk to them about returning to the states and re acclimating to the culture at home and not allowing reverse culture shock to set in.

We allowed everyone to share important moments to them, and to talk about how the trip made them feel and how they felt about the help we provided. As always it was a great meeting and good for perspective. This team was remarkable. They are resilient, flexible, positive, team players, great attitudes, a real joy to lead.

I am sorry that I haven’t been able to get up as many blogs as I would have liked due to poor internet connection and in some cases none at all, there will be more video and written blogs to come when I get home. Here are some things that the team said.

Some said they sensed the real responsibility to carry the vision of bringing justice to the world because of what they have seen. They vowed I will not forget.

Some said they were impressed by the leaders here and that there is hope because of the all out commitment to Christ that they have. They said that one leader told them that all the things we have done are such an encouragement because it makes them know that they are not forgotten and they don’t feel like the are in this all alone.

One said she was just so thankful for being able to come on the trip and sees it as a destiny move for her. God has opened her eyes to the need around her.

Others said, the have a revelation how simple it is to meet need if you just have a mind to do it.

One said it is so powerful how much compassion God has and how he provides for the orphans through Christians and the church. She said I have seen God use teams here and our team to provide the needs of widows and orphans, she sees how God works and what the church is really all about.

One said “I have never seen anything like the things we have encountered on this trip and it opens your eyes to our responsibility to use our blessings wisely and to be grateful for what we have been given.

Others comment were things like, “I have more compassion,” also “I see Hope.”

There was much more and these are just a few paraphrased comments. Truth is the experience is life changing, for us and the people we are helping. I’m glad God lets us be a part of helping others. Its awesome.

David

Just getting started…

Its been a great week, and there are some more video blogs and pics coming so be looking for them. Just wanted to let you know that this week, we have Fed, clothed, ministered too, thrown birthday parties for, and played with the orphans of our two hope houses and in our friends Feeding program. We took one group of them to see the eighth wonder of the world…”angkor Wat” It was very interesting, fun, and extremely hot. The humidity is unreal. Lets just say we sweated some.

Can’t wait to get back and get rolling on some local stuff, love living life, doing what we do, helping others and changing the world, with the Gospel of Jesus Christ. Global reach for Justcie….righting wrongs!

Thanks
David

Harvest superstar 2…

Andrew and Allison Morris. Andrew and Allison are our Edmond Campus Pastors. This couple are definitely “go getters.” Allison also serves as our RTG director. They are superstars because of their heart for people. When they talk about reaching out to people or projects we are working on, you can hear their passion for God. This will be their third trip to Cambodia. They have literally raised over thirty five thousand dollars for their trips and projects over the last 3 years. They have made ongoing relationships with people in cambodia and Andrew has gone as far as to connect with local cambodians to learn the Khmer language.

They are hard workers, and great team leaders, and most importantly they truly care about sharing the Gospel of Jesus Christ through words and actions. Yep, definitely global reach superstars.

Pumped…

I am so excited about all the great things happening with harvest. We are leaving for Cambodia in just over five days. This trip is going to be awesome! Be watching the blog for all the updates. Some will be written, others video, its going to be a fascinating and life changing trip. If for no other reason then i get the privilege of taking my oldest daughter, Taylor with me. She is 15 and a passionate Christian. Locally she is involved in our Creative team at harvest, she plays the acoustic and is starting to lead worship in some settings. She is very committed to the cause of Christ and has a real evangelistic spirit in her school. She has known for years that she is called to be a world changer. I have done my best to inspire her about life, but leave the destiny and purpose things between her and God, and She believes she is called to live her life in ministry.

So I am proud that another generation of Gadberry’s are stepping up to the plate to make a difference in the world. She will be the fourth generation ministry leader.

Let me move on before i get carried away and ahead of myself. It is such a thrill to take her and to be able to partner together to help people. If I haven’t learned anything else as a parent I have learned its always better to model what you want for your kids than it is to merely talk about it.

So what better way to teach Taylor how to help people, how to reach the world with the love and Gospel of Jesus than to take her, and let her do it with me.

I have also learned that these times provide for some of the greatest bonding experiences in a parent/child relationship. I love it that I am not struggling, or fighting with her about teenage issues, but rather partnering with her to change the world.

I love it that my kids love God, love the church, and love the ministry.

Its gonna be fun! Here we go!

David