Something to say about Leadership…My daddy’s bigger than your daddy.

I believe that in order for us to break free from insecurity, which remember is fear, we must have the right perspective about several things. The first of which is the right perspective about God. It really is sad to me how many people see God through a skewed view point. Instead of believing Him based on what He says about Himself, many have taken other peoples word for who God is and what He does, and many times their perspective is based on fear. It reveals their own insecurity and by no means truly reflects the heart of God.

How do you see God? Many See him as a mean spirited judge who is anything but just. They see Him as a vengeance seeking tyrant who wants to destroy people when they make a mistake. Others see Him as a sadistic Jester who gets his kicks out of playing with our lives. Others See him as a force, far removed, and distant from our lives. How do you see Him?

Why does it matter? I believe if we have the right perspective about God then we can have a right relationship with Him, and if we have a right relationship with him, and we get a true revelation of what that means, fear will be run out of our lives. How do you see God?

We can view Him a lot of different ways. As the powerful creator, who created all that is. We could view Him as the bible describes Him the first and the last. The genesis and final authority of all things. We could see Him as the judge. Make no mistake, He is. He will be the final judge of all things. Isn’t it interesting however that while we could view Him as all these things, that is not how Jesus said we should view Him and It isn’t what He illustrates in the new Testament.

How did Jesus say we should view Him? In Matthew 6:9, Jesus was teaching the disciples how to pray, and He said, “In this manner, therefore, pray: Our Father in Heaven, Hallowed be your name.” Couldn’t he have said, our creator in heaven? Or our Great Judge in Heaven? Or even just the Hallowed one in heaven? He purposefully told us to call Him Father. A few versus before this he said “pray to your father in secret” Jesus is telling us to look at God as our father. When Jesus, God’s son, referred to Him, he called Him father. It may not be clear yet why this is important, but follow me, you’ll see.

The new testament gives us several illustrations of this. The story of the prodigal son. This story is a picture of the relationship between God and Man, God being the father. The Gospels say in luke, “if you being earthly men know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more does your father in Heaven want to give you the Holy Spirit. There is One more scripture I want to give you that kind of sums this up.

Romans 8:15 says, We have not been given the spirit of bondage again to fear, but the spirit of adoption, whereby we cry, abba Father. This passage of Scripture answers our question. Why does this matter? It tells us that we have been adopted by a good father so we don’t need to be afraid.

Please don’t take me out of context or understand me to say that God is not the judge, or creator, or due reverence, but God wants us to view him as our father. Why? Because when you truly realize that God is your Dad, then you will also realize there is nothing to be afraid of. Not poverty, cause your dad owns it all. Not sickness cause your dad cares for you and is also your healer. Not stress, because your dad is bigger than all that, and He loves you. He says, Im not just a father, but I’m a good father.

I really didn’t understand this until I became a father, and experienced a fathers love. I know how much I care for my girls. I know I would do anything for them. I would fight hell itself, I would give my own life, I would go to what ever extent to take care of them. I’m imperfect, I have flaws, I don’t always get it right, but if I have this heart towards my kids, and God is perfect and He never gets it wrong then what a great dad He must be.

So what does that have to do with overcoming insecurity? Were you ever on the playground and got in an argument with another kid about who’s dad is the best or biggest, and what does it always come down to. Someone says, “my dad is bigger than your dad.” Well in this case that is always true.

No matter what we are facing, our father, God is always bigger. So if God is always bigger than what do I have to be afraid of? Why should I be insecure. Fear, insecurity, much of the time is driven by intimidation. We feel intimidated by our circumstances, or competitive because of someone else’s gifts. However if we truly get a revelation of God that he is our father, and he is good, and he wants what’s best for us. If i really believe that, and that’s the perspective I have in life, then I have no need to fear. My girls know, I’m always here for them. In my humanity some day that won’t be true, because physically I can’t always be there. Humanity doesn’t apply to God. He said in Matthew…”I will never leave you or forsake you.”

So I encourage you as a leader if you want to overcome insecurity and really find your place and confidence then begin to see God like he wants you to see Him. Not as a judgmental person who is merely tolerating you, but a loving father who is always there for you.

Thank God for His grace, his mercy, and His Father’s heart. Let me encourage you, the beginning of this type of understanding is to become a son or daughter of God. You do that by inviting Jesus into your life, and forgiving your sins and committing to follow him. If you ask him to have this relationship with you he will.

David

Something to Say About Leadership…It’s all about perspective

A great lesson I’ve learned over the years is all people see life through certain filters, or lenses. Our lives are truly a vision of the perspectives we have. Many people can’t seem to get ahead in life, because they see themselves as a victim, so they view life from that perspective. Everything that happens, every relationship, every opportunity, every rejection to them is about the fact that everyone is against them, they are doing their best and people are just keeping them down. It’s amazing what a little perspective change can do. Simply shifting the “way” we see things, can have a profound effect on our lives.

I believe there’s a cycle here. The cycle works this way. We have certain perspectives, view points (the point from which we see things). Our perspectives effect our view, which effects our thoughts. Our thoughts effect our actions. Our actions solicit responses, and those responses bring reinforcement to our perspectives.

Let me give you an example. If a person thinks that others don’t like them, then when they go to pubic gatherings, they are usually reserved, shy, disconnected. This action sends out a vibe that says don’t approach me, so people in response stay back, and this reinforces in that persons mind, “see, I knew people didn’t like me, I should have just stayed home.” Is there truth to this, no. There is no evidence that people don’t like them. They are just stuck in the cycle of fear of rejection, because they have a perspective, for whatever reason that they are not liked. Maybe it was a rejection by a parent, maybe it was betrayal by a friend in their youth. Who knows, but their perspective has them trapped.

On the other hand if you have a person who thinks everyone likes them, their actions speak of confidence and openness, the response is people are drawn to them, and it reinforces their thought, “see, I knew it, every one likes me.”

In either of these situations the fact that people do or don’t like them, doesn’t matter, what matters is their perspective. Because they will behave in ways directed by the way they see things, and their behavior will evoke a response, and the response will reinforce their perspective.

You can see how important perspective is. How do you see your life? What are the filters you see through? What perspectives need to change or even be done away with? If we’re going to lead, then we need to make sure our perspectives are not driven by insecurity. We can’t see the world through fear, and expect to be successful leaders.

There are two places this cycle can be broken. One is in a person changing their perspective, another is in people responding in love to a person regardless of their actions, which can break the cycle and give them a new perspective. Both of these are acts of leadership, and both of these take massive amounts of courage and security. We can do it!

What are perspective shifts you’ve had? How did they effect your life?

Next blog, we will talk about the next step towards security.

thanks
David

Something to Say About Leadership…What is Insecurity?

In life we hear the word insecurity often. We use this word to describe people who lack confidence, people who wear their emotions on their sleeves, and people who are enamored with the idea of pleasing other people.

What is insecurity really? The dictionary defines it as an unsafe feeling. A state of mind characterized by self-doubt and vulnerability. So insecurity is a feeling of not being secure. It is a feeling of being a target for hurt or harm, when you get right down to it insecurity in its true meaning is just plane fear, the fear that we are not safe.

We’ve thought of insecurity as an overly emotional state, immaturity, and a lack of confidence. All these things characterize insecurity. They also Characterize fear. Insecurity simply means I’m afraid I’m going to be rejected. It means I’m afraid I’m going to fail. It means I’m afraid I’m going to hurt. It means I’m afraid to risk. It means I just don’t feel safe.

We can all see how this can sabotage a leader. This type of thinking paralyzes a leader. Keeps them from moving forward. Keeps their focus on their performance not the vision. What we need to do however is remove the mystery from the word insecurity and just call it what it is, Fear. Say it after me. “I am afraid.” We all go through this at different times. It’s what we do in those times that matters. Will we see insecurity for what it is and eliminate it, or will we see it as a small weakness and let it stay. It’s fear, and if you are a leader fear is your mortal enemy!

Fear is the enemy of the leader. That’s the way we should look at it. We need to listen and believe the bible. Romans 8:15 says, “we have not been given the spirit of bondage again to fear, but the spirit of adoption whereby we cry abba father. It says in Timothy, “God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of love, of power, and of a sound mind. So Fear does the transverse of this passage. It eliminates love, makes us feel weak, and paints us into a corner of confusion. Fear is an enemy to the leader.

We need to understand the power Insecurity and fear can have if we allow it in our lives. What does it cause? If I fear people’s opinions than I can’t lead with a clear vision, If I fear taking a risk, or failing, then I will stick with the status quo. If I fear rejection from people I will be obsessed with my performance and never feel like I’m good enough. It really is a killer of leadership. We must force it out of our lives.

I taught our staff today, on the idea that leading progress requires courage. Its possible to lead and not be moving forward, Moses did it for 40 years in the wilderness. It took courage for Joshua to get it moving forward. God told Joshua in the book of Joshua chapter one, to “be strong and of good courage and not to be afraid” four times. He was getting the point across to Joshua that it was going to take courage to lead to the fulfillment of the dream, to do the right things, to stand against fear itself, and bottom line it takes courage to lead people. It requires us to do the uncomfortable, to confront, and to influence others.

When I was starting out, I wanted everyone to like me. I thought that was leadership. It made me second-guess my communication. I wondered constantly if I was measuring up. It caused me to compete with others in my own mind, and to compare myself with others. I was afraid I would be rejected or I wouldn’t succeed. It wasn’t until I realized leadership is a “stand alone” place much of the time and It takes courage to help people. You can’t help people if you are constantly seeking their approval, because then it’s all about you and not them.

There are ways to defeat this fear. There are perspectives we must have, and perspectives we must change to defeat this enemy. It can be done.

Next blog I will talk about the first way to overcome insecurity, and how our perspectives can create either a vicious cycle of fear, or a victories cycle of confidence.

Hope this is helping you. Please comment on fears you have faced in leadership and how you have overcome them.

-David

Something to say about Leadership

Over 20 years ago I began my journey as a leader. My Journey if far from over. I still have much to learn, and haven’t begin to tap into the true potential that could be realized in my life. I wish I could say that I have reached some sort of pinnacle, but what I have found to be true at the age of forty, is that those who think they have reached the top, really haven’t, but have left themselves no where to go but down.

True, effective leaders are always growing, and developing themselves, and everyone around them. A true leader gives the benefit of their growth to those following them.

I am going to attempt over the next few weeks to blog each day on an issue of leadership. Over the last two decades I’ve read many books, I’ve attended many conferences. I have had the privilege of setting under the ministry of some of the greatest leaders out there and had the opportunity to meet them and set and listen to them.

Over this time I have gleaned enormous amounts of resource, but to be honest this is not where I’ve received most of my leadership “education.” In those settings I learned principles, and leadership thoughts, but it has been in the everyday activities of leading alongside the leaders over me, beside me, and those following me, where I have learned the most. Not because they knew more than the experts, but because we were putting into practice those things we learned.

In this series of blogs I am not going to try to tell you all the principles of leadership that will work for you. I am going share with you experiences in my own life, and in the lives of leaders I’ve watched rise, and fall.

There are things that kill Leadership. Enemies of leadership. Most of them are not external. They are not an enemy from without, but an enemy from within. Pretense, Fear, Jealousy, competition, envy, pride and Greed. All of these, everyone of them, can be summed up in one word, “INSECURITY.” In my mind the greatest Killer of leaders and our influence. Insecurity is sneaky, its often hidden, its always revealed under pressure, and ultimately it will choke the life of leadership out of any leader who doesn’t remove it.

As I write these next few blogs, I hope it will reveal places of insecurity in us and help us to understand there is a way to overcome it. Our leadership can thrive! Our Potential can be realized! We can be Secure, confident, happy, and content, and at the same time very influential.

stay tuned….

Does anybody Care?

I have a great life! I get to meet a lot of people, from different backgrounds, in diverse settings, and issues on different levels. Just for the record, everyone deals with “stuff.” Everyone. Everyone in this life has ups and downs. Many victories and many travesties, and sometimes they come right on the heals of each other.

The one thing I know that “life” is not prejudice. It does not prejudge in any way. Everyone goes through it. By the way there is only one option if you don’t want to go through it. I think that life is what you make it, our perspective has a lot to do with our survival. Whether dealing with good or bad times, we can choose to be positive.

I think one problem we have, is when we get down, we can’t see anyone else. Its like, all of a sudden our life is locked in to a long stare in the mirror, and we don’t like what we see. I was watching “extreme home makeover” the other day, I love it. I love seeing people do good things for other people. There was a young man on it named Patrick Henry Hughes. He was born without eyes, and without the ability to straighten his limbs. He is now nineteen and quite an inspiration. He is a great musician! I can’t do his story justice by any mean, he is so inspirational! He has a book out, I’m going to get it. I can’t Imagine how so many of us have such minor issues compared to him, and yet he and his dad worked together to keep him moving forward, and we can find every excuse to slow to almost a stop.

When we are down and in that stare down with ourselves we can’t see anyone else, so the question arises, does anyone care? The answer of course, is yes! Absolutely yes! Someone does care. First and foremost God cares. The bible says in 2 Peter, that we should cast our care on Him because He cares for us. Others care. I bet we would be surprised how many other people care, if we would just let them in, if we, when we’re hurt would let down our guard and quit sending the message that we don’t want to be bothered.

I’ve had several wake up calls in my life. I call them that, because they are I was asleep to, until someone woke me up. Issues like human trafficking, foster kids, HIV/aides, orphans, starving people around the globe. When I first wake up to an issue, i always get zealous, then I see the need, it seems overwhelming, then I decide what i can do to help, then I go about doing it. In this process there is always a temptation to say, why doesn’t anyone care? Where are all the people that should be doing something about this? However, invariably I find out as i continue my quest to help, there are a lot of people out there caring. Some of them have different motives than others, but what I can say is Somebody does care.

Yes, more should care, and its up to us to get more people informed and involved, but lets not curse the baby as we are throwing the bath water out. I encourage you if your down, realize no one can read your mind. Ask yourself, “is my attitude a sign on my forehead that says, stay away from me?”

Ask for help. Ask someone to get involved. Tell someone close to you, that you need them, because I tell you with certainty, someone does care. Don’t give up, don’t quit, someone does care. If you can’t do anything but cry out to God and ask him to send someone to you, He will. He cares.

Someone Who Cares
David

Depraved…

I have just finished watching “Nightlines” report on tracking a pedophile in Phnom Penh Cambodia. I feel much like i do every time I encounter this. I feel a full spectrum of emotion. I want to cry for the hopelessness of the situation, I’m enraged at a person who could be so depraved as to move from one country to another and make a life there for the purpose of sexually abusing children. Its appalling, so much so that your mind almost wants to say “is this really happening?” Its the ultimate in Surreal.

I probably would say that like so many americans do, except I’ve been there, and I have worked with many children who have been rescued from the sex trade, and our ministry spends time and money to help keep this from happening to other children and helping those this has happened to.

Make no mistake, this is happening all over the world. It is interesting how it happens. The culture is ripe for it, because of what has happened in the history of Cambodia, there are some in that culture that do not have the same respect for human life as others, and there are predators many who are american who take full advantage of this. They see children as a product not a person. Couple that with poverty beyond the pale and you have the makings of using human beings as slaves. Let me just say however, that so much of the cambodian population are very loving, caring people, we have many great friends there, that frankly are changing their nation for good from the inside out.

Its very interesting to me that this man they are reporting on, “Harvey Johnson” an american has gone there and is living there, he is a pedophile disguising himself as an english teacher. The people of Cambodia want to learn english very badly, and its a perfect front to trap kids. He can set himself up as a trusted american there to help them, and make a living in doing so. While there are many organizations that use this tool for good, this man is taking advantage of the culture to please himself.

What is so profoundly treacherous about this situation is that it is in mass destroying the lives of innocent children. Effecting them mentally, spiritually, emotionally and Physically, many times at the hands of their own desperate parents. I can’t tell you the stories I have heard and witnessed for myself of little girls as young as 5, that have been abused. Some that have lost their mind, some have lost their ability to ever have children of their own. Some have been so deeply scarred their future looks bleak at best. However there are many great organizations working with these children around the world. Some who are literally rescuing these children right out of the hands of their abusers. Others have taken the role of aftercare, and counseling. Many organizations are helping pro-actively by getting kids off the streets, and out of situations where they could be taken, or bought for human trafficking purposes.

I have also seen so many of these children who are such success stories of what compassion, love, counseling and ministry can do. Turn their whole world around and give them a safe, second chance.

We work with several and know others, but there are a lot of people out there trying to do something about this travesty. Lest you bury your head in the sand, don’t think it is not happening right here in america. the statistics of children who are being used and abused in sex trade settings in our own country are astounding. WAKE UP! Help! do something, we can not let this stand. Its our responsibility to help the innocent to speak up for those who can not speak for themselves. Who have no choice, who are in the clutches of people who will use them for profits until they are not worth using and then toss them aside like little more than an old dish rag.

We are doing what we can, and I am continually pursuing partnerships, and relationships to work with in this endeavor. How can you help? You can support the organizations that are doing something, or you can get on the front lines and help that way. We are doing both.

Come and see and support what Global reach for justice (Church of the harvest’s global initiative) is doing around the world, to help in this arena and others.

November 13 Friday night, our global reach for justice banquet (fund raiser) withe special guests the Watoto children’s choir from Uganda Africa. It will be a night to hear what we have done, and what we are going to do in 2010 and beyond.

Other organizations to help as well are, International Crisis Aid, International Justice Mission, A21 campaign (chris Cain).

When I saw this for the first time, the little baby girls that are so precious and was told their stories, and read the case files, i was left in a heap, and could only think about my own daughters, and how I would turn the world upside down, if someone were to try to harm them like this. Well, I believe that God has made us as responsible for the innocent as he has our own families and we must stand for them, we must act for them, we must speak for them, we must give for them, and we must stop this for them.

I am not writing this as a spectator on the sidelines, but as a person who has been there, who has seen this first hand, and who is doing something, although I wish much more, we are doing what we can. There are a lot of ways to help, we can all do something.

I will be writing on this more in the next few days. Lets take this head on and lets stop this madness. Kudos to Nightline for exposing this evil.

Thanks
David

“I Love the Lord”…..Whitney Houston

I watched the rerun of the Oprah show late tonight and saw the second interview with Whitney Houston. I really didn’t know what to expect, but I was so impressed with her. She was very honest without being disrespectful, which i would imagine would have been very difficult given what she has experienced. It seems her life, had become very much like so many lives today. Simply out of control. Her marriage, her emotions, her physical life, and her career. Everything was out of control.

She obviously made some bad choices, and got herself in a mess. Addicted to drugs, estranged from her husband, and just trying to pull it together. My favorite part of the interview was when Oprah said, “who do you love?” Whitney replied, “I love the Lord” Oprah asked her so how did you make it? She said I know where my strength comes from, I would never have made it if it wasn’t for God.

Our lives may or may not be out of control today, but it wouldn’t hurt for us to remember we can not make it without Jesus. He has done so much for us, and his grace is so good, and has empowered us to overcome all the negatives in life. So tonight I say like whitney, I love the Lord, and I would never have made it, outside of his goodness and Grace. I know where my strength comes from. Not me, but the Holy Spirit. Thanks Jesus for living in Me, guiding me, encouraging me, and inspiring me, and loving me.

Thanks
David

somebody please remove my designer shoe from my mouth…

If he’s smart that is what Kanye West is saying right now. I fear however that is the farthest thing from his mind. Its unfortunate that his immaturity and lack of contemplation caused him to act in a way that hurt another artist, and himself. If he really felt that way he could have communicated it much differently, in a mature manner, instead of rushing the stage and be so impulsive.

Its a good example of not thinking before you speak. Poor guy, is going to have a hard next few days, hope he learns from it. It really made him look foolish when Beyonce’ won the video of the year. I think The VMA’s did the right thing by canceling his performance. There are consequences to actions, and now he knows.

It should teach all of us really, because I dare to say, that many of us have this same problem its just not displayed on Live TV. The book of James in the bible teaches us to be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath. We should all practice this, and we could keep our feet out of our mouth.

I thought the way Beyonce’ handled it was terrific. I couldn’t think of a better way. She showed real class, and savvy to turn the situation around. A real veteran performers move.

Interesting night all around, great lesson in humility.
http://www.mtv.com/videos/?id=1620605
David

There’s always a story…

Lately I find myself learning a lot. Honestly that should be the norm with all of us, because if we’re not learning, we’re not growing, a truth we forget at times. I think what I am going through now is another phase maturing. Although it truly pains me to say it, I am getting older. No, i did not say I’m old, just getting older (i must qualify that for my own psyche).

What i’ve been learning lately is there’s always a story. Whenever we encounter someone who is hard to deal with, an out of control child, a person who seems to be dependent on another person, a person who regularly irritates others, someone who seems to always be in trouble, or even a family member who drives us crazy with their immaturity. Maybe even a person who writes huge run on sentences like the one you just read.

Whatever the case there is always a story. I think we should be aware of the story. We need the background before we can truly relate to someone. Now, I say this not to excuse wrong behavior. Not at all, but I say this for perspectives sake. We to quickly judge without knowing the situation. We rush to form an opinion without thinking it through. Maybe its because or society has become so politicized that we can’t think of peoples personal lives, but rather, where they fit on the continuum of our political spectrum and agenda.

lets not forget every person has their own story. If we know the story, then we can have the right perspective to relate to them and maybe even help. In ministry of course we’ve worked with all ages, all races, both genders, and even some confused about their gender, or their sexuality, the very poor and the very rich, and everyone in between.

When we see certain things, many times it speeds us to judgement, to opinion, to criticize, but how can we help if we don’t understand. I want to encourage you before you judge develop a relationship and hear the story, because if you do, you won’t end up judging at all, you will end up caring, being compassionate, and helping that person. You will realize they are not just the other side of a political agenda, or a moral standard, they are a person whose gone through some stuff.

I can’t begin to share all the stories. When working with foster kids and at times getting frustrated with behavior and then you hear the story, your frustration subsides and an overwhelming compassion and compulsion rises in you and says, “I will help this child!”

In working with people who seem to never be able to get over problems or obstacles, or addictions, you want to judge or be tired of it, but then you hear the story, and you realize my opinion matters little, but my love and action can make a change.

So, today, before we form our opinions of others, before we generalize and put everyone in the same box. Before we decide we know more than we really do, I implore you, listen to the story. You’re perspective will shift, and action will follow.

Am i say its ok to continue down a wrong road, or that people should be excused for wrong behavior because of their story? NO

But I’m also saying they can’t be helped effectively unless someone is willing to hear their story.

So what’s your story?

Thanks
David

Change

Change is a fact of life. Change is a product of growth. Change is inevitable. So why do so many people hate it, resist it, or fight it? Its really not hard to understand, change around us requires change within us. I heard someone say not long ago, everyone likes change, as long as its someone else doing the changing.

That statement is funny, but so true. What I have come to realize as a leader is is we are going to be progressive, forward moving, or successful in anything we do we must learn to lead through change. If what you’re doing is going to grow it must change. Look at a tree, when it grows it changes. It takes more room, it changes shape, and size. As it grows it creates new issues and needs. Its the natural way of growth.

We all say we want growth, but do we want the change that growth requires. When God puts opportunity in front of us, it requires change on our part. If we have to change the way we do things, it requires an internal change of submission in us.

In sharing vision with one of campuses about our new connect group ministry, I asked, “how many of you want to be a part of helping people becoming followers of Christ?” Of course everyone wants to be a part of this great cause, the question is are we willing for our lives, friendships, comforts, schedules to change to accomplish this.

We need to change our thinking. Change is good. Change is exciting! Change is growth. Remember fear paralyzes us. When we resist, hate, or fight change we are driven by fear. Positive change is a natural part of positive growth. So lets grow and change.

Embrace the Change!